Virginia
Liner notes
What does one do when a former royal is arrested the day before open mic? Hurry something out, of course. I don't consider this a good song, but showing up with a short shelf-life bit about current events usually buys a bit of generosity from the crowd. I stole the opening and closing verses from sources unknown, too good to pass over. I like to think of this as a John O'Farrell-esque piece -- three jokes wrapped up in some paragraphs.The Grand Old Duke of York,
Paid ten million quid
To somebody he never met,
For things he never did.
He used to have a team of staff,
Who'd get him out of sticky fixes
But now they're sharing photographs,
Of a man from Norfolk in his sixties
Interrupt his morning brew,
Down the station, take his prints
Under caution interview,
The arsehole formerly known as "Prince" *I'm really not sure it's valid to rhyme 'prints' with 'prince'.
Misconduct in a public office,
Historical offences
No-one warned him that the coppers,
Might enforce some consequences
It's too late for Virginia,
But looking back I can't avoid a
Hope she's looking down on here,
With a sense of Schadenfreude
I'm sure the police send to grab him
Wouldn't bend to any pressure
But here's how to solve his housing problem:
Detain him at his brother's pleasure
The Grand Old Duke of York,
Paid ten million quid
To somebody he never met,
For things he never did